I'm at a loss today on how I am suppose to feel. Or think. Or react. Or react to other's reaction regarding the suicide of Robin Williams.
It is tragic and sad when the world loses anyone by their own hand, famous or not, genius or regular, celebrated comedian and actor or an unknown with little to no accomplishments. But with that being said, I do understand that when it's someone that has touched our lives for years, that is responsible for so many personal laughs and smiles, people feel more connected to the loss. We feel that we know him. We feel that the loss for his family is one shared by us.
I also don't want to diminish the very real pain of depression. I understand its depths and its darkness.
I was 19, going through chemotherapy, missing out on college, hearing about all of my friend's adventures as they prepared for their futures, while I prepared for that week's chemo.
I was 23, in isolation during my bone marrow transplant, my college years had now been interrupted a second time - and quite possibly I would never be able to return because my life had been reduced to days and weeks - and in isolation you have nothing but hours to let your mind wander, thinking about what might have been, what should have been, but now will never be.Continue reading